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Why Not Put Me In Charge Of The Tories? At Least I'd Make Sure Their MPs Were Less Likely To Be Ignorant Boors Who Are Over-fond Of Drink
Richard Ingrams, The Observer Review, page 2, 19 January 1997 [extract]
After writing last week about the Scientology movement, as championed by a number of famous film stars (not to mention the distinguished novelist Gore Vidal and even a Liberal Democrat spokesman in the House of Lords, Lord McNair), I decided to find out a little more about the organisation by reading a life of its founder L. Ron Hubbard, Bare-Faced Messiah, by the former Sunday Times journalist Russell Miller.
I quoted George Orwell last week ('There might be a lot of cash in starting a new religion') and so was delighted to find on page 148 of Mr Miller's fascinating book the following quotation from L. Ron. 'If a man really wanted to make a million dollars, the best way to do it would be to start his own religion.' Among all the great fraudsters, villains and crooks who have flourished this century, L. Ron Hubbard must rank very high. A one-time bigamist and black magic practitioner, he lied and cheated his way through life, stealing money, seducing women and selling bogus medical panaceas to the gullible. His published fantasies about his own early career make Lord Archer look like a model of autobiographical integrity, while compared to L. Ron's business methods, those of Robert Maxwell look positively scrupulous.
Yet today, 11 years after Hubbard's death, the Scientology movement is a flourishing concern. Our own Government has recognised the movement as a bona fide religion and granted it charitable status. It is not clear how you can have a religion without a god, unless the Government believes that the late L. Ron qualifies for deification status under its regulations. If so, he may be the first big-time crook to be given official approval in the divine category. Whatever the truth, by living and dying L. Ron will have proved the truth of his and Orwell's dictum.
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